A big, handy holiday streaming guide

48 movies to watch at all kinds of seasonal gatherings (or by yourself)

Being the Movie Person in your family or friend group is a sacred role.

This time of the year, it often falls on you to select something for everyone to watch. If you don’t have any suggestions handy, you may just be forced to endure a movie where Kurt Russell plays Santa Claus, or an AppleTV original where Will Ferrell and Ryan Reynolds engage in holiday humor.

In the interest of helping everyone avoid that fate, I want you all to become the Movie Person this year. I’ve dug deep into the archives¹ to compile an extensive (if not comprehensive) streaming guide for the holidays.

To be clear, this is not just a list of movies about Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc… although there are plenty of those on here. Instead, I’ve come up with a few useful (and okay, a few pithy) categories for all different kinds of holiday gatherings. There are newer releases (Hit Man, The Substance), tried-and-true classics (Moonstruck, Andrei Rublev), and Philomena.

And don’t worry, there’s even a section for people who are decidedly not gathering.

Although some of the category titles are a joke, I stand by all the movies listed. If this guide helps even one person avoid having to watch Four Christmases, Deck the Halls, or some other holiday mediocrity it will have been worth it!

Happy holidays. Let’s get down to business.

Movies your parents will like

I’m putting a little bit of everything here: Holiday-themed movies, newer releases, moving stories about trying to find your son/grandson. Your parents will like these, and you will too 😇

• Home for the Holidays (Streaming on Paramount+)- The quintessential Thanksgiving movie; funny, well-acted (Holly Hunter!), and not overly sentimental. If your family is yapping during the opening credits, wait for a quiet moment to let them know this was directed by none other than Jodie Foster.

• The Holdovers (Streaming on Prime Video)- It’s a comedy set over Christmas! Plus, Paul Giamatti’s voice and mannerisms will simply thrill you and your loved ones.

• Hit Man (Streaming on Netflix)- If you’re looking for a new release, everyone will love seeing the guy from Twisters (Glen Powell) as an undercover hitman who falls for one of his potential clients. Plus it’s (kind of) based on a true story, which parents love.

• Philomena (Streaming for free on Tubi)- A comedy, a tearjerker, a wonderfully acted road movie starring Dame Judi Dench! If your parents (or you, for that matter) haven’t seen Philomena, show them Philomena!

• Let Him Go (Streaming on Peacock)- I have a theory that if this movie hadn’t been released at the beginning of the Covid lockdowns it would have been a sleeper hit with the Gen X and Boomer audiences. Kevin Coster and Diane Lane confronting a deranged family (led by a scene-stealing Lesley Manville) to rescue their grandson? Sounds like box office gold to me!

Movies your adult children will like

Stop trying to make your grown ass kids watch Braveheart, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, or, God forbid, Forrest Gump. Your nostalgia is not their nostalgia. It’s time to move on from movies that aired nonstop on cable 20+ years ago. Let me, an adult son with unimpeachable taste, suggest a few alternatives.

• Moonstruck (Streaming for free on Tubi)- If your children don’t like this big, boisterous romantic comedy starring Cher and Nicolas Cage, you have my permission to write them out of the will.

• The Player (Streaming on Max and The Criterion Channel)- A Robert Altman specialty: A hilarious, fast-talking satire with a sprawling cast and a murder. If everyone likes this, move on to Gosford Park next.

• The Hunted (Streaming on Paramount+)- An FBI tracker (Tommy Lee Jones) hunts a serial killer (Benicio Del Toro) in the woods. That’s the setup of this lean, mean cat-and-mouse thriller from the late, great William Friedkin.

• Inside Man (Streaming on Starz)- Denzel Washington! Jodie Foster! Bank robbery! Spike Lee’s effortlessly entertaining film hits several sweet spots, and should play well with pretty much any crowd.

Friendsgiving crowd-pleasers (Normal people)

If you’re at a gathering with mixed company of cinephiles and normal people, there are ways to ensure everyone can have fun. Here are a couple new releases and some reliable classics for casual pre- or post-dinner viewing:

• Challengers (Streaming on Prime Video)- A sports movie, a hot bisexual throuple, and a great score- There is something here for pretty much everyone.

• Furiosa (Streaming on Max)- Even if they didn’t see Mad Max: Fury Road, this prequel is a surefire way to jolt people awake after dinner. (And if they haven’t seen Fury Road… watch that too).

• What’s Up, Doc? (Streaming for free on Tubi)- A screwball comedy. Remember those? Barbra Streisand is a consummate stinker terrorizing Ryan O’Neal’s skittish researcher in Peter Bogdanovich’s chaotic romance 🐰🥕

• The Daytrippers (Streaming on Max and The Criterion Channel)- Worried her husband is having an affair after finding a mysterious love note, Eliza (Hope Davis) and her family set off on a wild ride around New York City to track down the truth. Hilarious! Parker Posey!

• Married to the Mob (Streaming for free on Kanopy and Tubi)- Michelle Pfeiffer is fantastic as a mob-wife-turned-widow trying to make a new life in this charming, outlandish comedy from Jonathan Demme.

Friendsgiving crowd-pleasers (Sickos)

Alright, if you’re hosting a gathering of Weirdos Anonymous this holiday season, I won’t stop you. In fact, I may stop by! And if I do, we’re probably watching one of these.

• The Substance (Streaming on Mubi)- Your fellow weirdos might try to show this to you. If they haven’t seen it for some reason, this hilarious, outlandish body horror film is your first stop after dinner.

• In the Cut (Streaming on Paramount+)- Widely dismissed at the time of its release, Jane Campion’s twisted erotic thriller starring Meg Ryan and Mark Ruffalo is finally developing the cult following it deserves. Join us 😈

• Krisha (Streaming for free on Kanopy)- A reminder that Thanksgiving can always be so much worse.

• Mute Witness (Streaming on AMC+ and Shudder)- A ruthlessly suspenseful film about a mute makeup artist locked inside a movie studio. When she discovers men filming a snuff film, the chase is on, and she’s fighting for her life.

• May (Streaming for free on Tubi)- This film has one of the best single-sentence IMDb descriptions I’ve ever encountered: “A socially awkward veterinary assistant with a lazy eye and obsession with perfection descends into depravity after developing a crush on a boy with perfect hands.” If that doesn’t at least pique your curiosity, I don’t know what will!

Alone for the holidays

Let me be clear: Do not feel bad about spending any holiday alone. People are overrated. Make (or order) a gluttonous feast for one, and settle in with these grandiose epics.

• The Irishman (Streaming on Netflix)- I watched this during my Covid quarantined Thanksgiving in 2020 while making (or buying and reheating) turkey and a bunch of side dishes. It’s a perfect way to spend 3.5 hours by yourself.

• The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (Streaming on Max)- David Fincher’s adaptation of the hit novel is exacting and brutal yet very rewatchable. Plus, it’s famously the Feel Bad Movie of Christmas.

• Andrei Rublev (Streaming on The Criterion Channel)- Andrei Tarkovsky’s massive existential biopic sees the titular Russian painter as a drifter witnessing the horrors and beauty of history. This is one of my favorite films of all time, by the way.

• Cabaret (Streaming for free on Tubi)- Life is literally a cabaret, old chum. Come to the cabaret!

Christmas club classics

I don’t need to see Elf or Home Alone ever again. Straightforward Christmas movies really aren’t my thing. If you’re in this boat, there are a few notable exceptions that will both satiate the holiday crowd and keep you sane.

• It’s a Wonderful Life (Streaming for free on Prime Video/Freevee)- One of the great American films, period. A guaranteed tearjerker.

• Meet Me in St. Louis (Streaming for free on Tubi)- I exist at the center of the Venn Diagram of ‘Grandparent’ and ‘TikTok user,’ and so does this movie’s appeal.

• The Nightmare Before Christmas (Streaming on Disney+)- The rare movie that will please both goth teenagers and their overbearing parents. And I love the Oogie Boogie Man.

• The Muppet Christmas Carol (Streaming on Disney+)- The classic story, but with Muppets! And a wonderfully game performance from Michael Caine as Scrooge, too.

Christmas-ish movies for people who love debating whether Die Hard is a Christmas movie

I’m sure you know at least one person like this. You may even be this person. To which I say: It’s 2024, get a new personality! Maybe one of these will help 😃

• The Apartment (Streaming for free on Prime Video/Freevee and Tubi)- Like Die Hard, Billy Wilder’s classic comedy features an office holiday party. That’s probably where the similarities end, though.

• Batman Returns (Streaming on Max)- Mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it, but a kiss can be even deadlier… if you mean it. Something to think about.

• Catch Me If You Can (Streaming on Prime Video and Paramount+)- Tom Hanks chases Leonardo DiCaprio all over the place in this absorbing Steven Spielberg caper. Christmas does have a semi-prominent role, though it’s not as important of a role as Amy Adams.

Christmas-ish movies for those of us annoyed by people who love debating whether Die Hard is a Christmas movie

While the Die Hard debate rages at the kids’ table, here is some holiday movie conversation fodder for the grown-ups.

• Eyes Wide Shut (Streaming on Paramount+)- Cruise. Kidman. Kubrick. Christmas. If you haven’t seen Eyes Wide Shut, now is the time. And if you have, I don’t need to tell you to rewatch it, do I?

• Carol (Streaming on Netflix and Paramount+)- Cate Blanchett’s divorced, upper-class housewife and Rooney Mara’s shy, Santa-hat-wearing shopgirl lock eyes across a New York City department store. Nothing will be the same for either of them again in Todd Hayne’s ravishing 1950s-set romance.

• Notes on a Scandal (Streaming on Max)- An elderly lesbian teacher (Dame Judi Dench) blackmails a younger teacher (Cate Blanchett) she’s obsessed with after finding out about her affair with a teenage student. On the day of Jesus’ birth, the student texts Blanchett’s character “HappyXmas miss! Wish I woz fucking u blind rite now.”

• Morvern Callar (Streaming for free on Kanopy and Prime Video/Freevee)- A woman (Samantha Morton) finds her boyfriend dead by suicide on Christmas. That’s the jumping-off point for Lynne Ramsay’s masterful portrait of psychological upheaval. If that doesn’t hook you, nothing else will!

• A Christmas Tale (Streaming on AMC+ and Mubi)- A novelistic French family drama where every Christmas movie cliche is part of a literal blood feud. Fun!

Barn burners for your LGBTQ ‘chosen family’ gathering

One of the great things about being queer is the ability to cultivate your own community of friendship and support. Another great thing is showing that community a great (and sometimes semi-fucked up) movie 😃

• Tangerine (Streaming on Netflix, Hulu, and for free on Kanopy and Tubi)- Shot entirely on an iPhone, Sean Baker’s Christmas Eve odyssey features two friends tearing across L.A. in search of an unfaithful pimp boyfriend.

• Rotting in the Sun (Streaming on Mubi)- Sebastián Silva’s film begins as a meta comedy on a gay nude beach and transforms into a nail-biting thriller halfway through. Don’t look up anything else before watching!

• Love Lies Bleeding (Streaming on Max)- Kristen Stewart’s gym manager falls for Katy O’Brien’s bodybuilder, and the two become embroiled in the criminal underworld in this wicked, intense film from Rose Glass.

• Benedetta (Streaming on Hulu)- Paul Verhoeven’s gleeful 17th-century melodrama hinges on the title character rising to power at her convent while simultaneously falling in forbidden love with another nun.

• Come Back to the 5 & Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean (Streaming for free on Kanopy)- Big secrets and bigger speeches dominate Robert Altman’s astonishing film about a 20-year friend reunion. It also boasts three excellent leading performances from Cher, Karen Black, and Sandy Dennis.

Movies your boyfriend who bought or considered buying a Drive (2011) leather jacket will like

First off, consider dumping him. If that doesn’t work, watch one of these.

• Manhunter (Streaming on The Criterion Channel and for free on Prime Video/Freevee)- Michael Mann’s gorgeously propulsive take on the Hannibal Lecter Universe, where Brian Cox appears as the catty cannibal therapist. (Released years before Silence of the Lambs, which your boyfriend will love).

• Memories of Murder (Streaming for free on Tubi)- Bong Joon-ho’s serial killer classic is perfect for the boyfriend who needs a new Zodiac. And what boyfriend doesn’t?

• Michael Clayton (Streaming on Paramount+)- A masterful legal thriller, just be prepared for him to start saying “Do I look like I’m negotiating?”

• Out of Sight (Streaming on Paramount+)- A sexy, sleek robbery romance with George Clooney (Michael Clayton) and Jennifer Lopez. One of Steven Soderbergh’s best!

Movies your girlfriend who took one semester of French in college and wouldn’t stop talking about Portrait of a Lady on Fire for 3 years will like

Now I'm even happier you both get to experience these movies together and discuss them for the next 3 years 💃

• The Age of Innocence (Streaming on The Criterion Channel)- They’re going to go wild for this one. And you will, too.

• Phantom Thread (Streaming on Netflix)- Another Daniel Day Lewis period romance, this one with a kinky twist. They’re also going to go wild for this one.

• La Chimera (Streaming on Hulu)- One of the best films of last year (or this year, depending on where you live and how you perceive time). Alice Rohrwacher’s stunning Italian folktale follows a man (Josh O’Connor) with the mystical ability to detect ancient artifacts in long-forgotten crypts underground.

• The End of the Affair (Streaming for free on Tubi)- An underrated ‘40s-set romance with wonderful performances from Ralph Fiennes and Julianne Moore. Sad!

I hope I didn’t come off as too much of a Grinch here. Actually, I don’t really care if I did 🥰 If you made it this far, let me know what movies you plan on showing to friends, loved ones, or to yourself this holiday season (and beyond) 👇

1. Streaming service catalogs and my Letterboxd diary